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Autumn 2009 @ our new website The Four Seasons of Haiku

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

burning interstate--
a fast car speeding through
the curved air

5 comments:

Alan Summers said...

Terrific couple of lines:

a fast car speeding through
the curved air


Alan

Wandering spirit said...

Thank you Alan. I am not happy with the first line, though..

diana l. said...

I, too, like the last two lines a lot. Keep reworking the first line -- perhaps replacing "interstate" with more descriptive words...

Alan Summers said...

Can you describe in just a basic prose description what you saw, and mean, by that first line?

Don't do anything else yet, just that.

all my best,

Alan

Wandering spirit said...

What about this, guys?

long empty road--
a fast car speeding through
the curved air