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Tuesday, July 7, 2009

awaits a rickshaw
under the gulmohar tree
a girl with lilac

--R.K.SINGH
at
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2 comments:

Area 17 said...

I wonder if you could experiment swapping the line order?

gulmohar tree
a girl with lilac
awaits a rickshaw

wikipedia weblink: gulmohar tree
.

July 08, 2009
Ram Krishna Singh said...

This definitely reads better, Alan.

I was aware that my version had something which needed to be changed, but I couldn't do it, despite my several attempts. Perhaps it was because I was stuck with "under the gulomohar tree". By dropping the preposition, you have achieved what I could not. Thank you very much.

R K

July 08, 2009

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