back to the sunset
the song of the blackbird
in the sunflower field
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♦ Discussion group (anthology project) The Four Seasons of Haiku on Facebook
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Summer Haiku 2009
A community of haiku poets recording and sharing their experiences of summer, in haiku, tanka, haiga, haibun and senryu. How to join see here...
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♦ Discussion group (anthology project) The Four Seasons of Haiku on Facebook
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5 comments:
nice feeling Gwilym
john
I love that first line because it beautifully, and originally sets up the phrase part of the haiku!
I wonder if adding "in" might enhance the idea of the two line phrase effect?
back to the sunset
the song of the blackbird
the sunflower field
back to the sunset
the song of the blackbird
in a sunflower field
back to the sunset
the blackbird's song
in a sunflower field
.
Beautiful images
Thanks Alan and you're absolutely right of course!
Lovely haiku. It's why I am so passionate about tweaking a single word. ;-0
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