
WELCOMEINTRODUCTIONHOW TO JOIN RULES

previous seasons
-------spring --------------summer ------------ autumn ----------- winter -----

2006 2007 2008 2009 2006 2007 2008 2006 2007 2008 2006 2007 2008

succeeding season
Autumn 2009 @ our new website The Four Seasons of Haiku

Sunday, August 2, 2009

dusk
around a Lammas fire
bats

4 comments:

David said...

I like this Rachel. Good one!

Pan Haiku Review said...

Cool, but do you know what kind so bats? That would add to it.

Also not sure about the line format with a colon.

e.g.

pipistrelle bats
around a Lammas fire
dusk comes early


???

?

David said...

yes I agree - ditch the colon

but we townies don't need to know what kind of bats

a strength of this haiku is evoked with the mysterious and evocative word 'Lammas' - there is no need to stretch us further

David

Rachel Green said...

Thank you both.
Help is always appreciated.

Alas, I don't know what sort of bats.