dusk
around a Lammas fire
bats
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♦ Discussion group (anthology project) The Four Seasons of Haiku on Facebook
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Summer Haiku 2009
A community of haiku poets recording and sharing their experiences of summer, in haiku, tanka, haiga, haibun and senryu. How to join see here...
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♦ Discussion group (anthology project) The Four Seasons of Haiku on Facebook
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4 comments:
I like this Rachel. Good one!
Cool, but do you know what kind so bats? That would add to it.
Also not sure about the line format with a colon.
e.g.
pipistrelle bats
around a Lammas fire
dusk comes early
???
?
yes I agree - ditch the colon
but we townies don't need to know what kind of bats
a strength of this haiku is evoked with the mysterious and evocative word 'Lammas' - there is no need to stretch us further
David
Thank you both.
Help is always appreciated.
Alas, I don't know what sort of bats.
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