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Autumn 2009 @ our new website The Four Seasons of Haiku

Monday, August 3, 2009

another sunday
of one hundred degree heat
far away...
thunder


otro domingo
con calor de cien grados
...truenos lejanos

4 comments:

Alan Summers said...

Hi Yansidara,

Love it, but not sure the format does your original poem justice.

Maybe something along the lines of...

another sunday
the one hundred degrees heat
of far away thunder


??

Alan

Yansidara said...

Thank you Alan for your observations. I do take your suggestions seriusly. Thank you again.

Yansidara said...

I seriously meant "seriously"

Alan Summers said...

.
another version:

far away thunder
one hundred degrees heat
of sunday


.